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Daily Archives: July 18, 2012

Shared Family Parenting Conclusions: What is Harmful to Children

            Children are harmed when parents:

  •  Encourage children to choose between them.
  • Make promises they do not keep.
  • Criticize the other parent to the child or in the child’s range of hearing.
  • Use the child as a messenger or negotiator or seek information about the other parent from the child.
  • Withhold access to the child for any reason unless there are safety concerns.
  • Involve the child in the court process or share legal information.
  • Introduce a new partner without adequate preparation. Remember that children need time to grieve the loss of family as they knew it and may not be ready to accept a new partner.

             Parents should remember that a child’s experience of divorce differs from their own. A child can often benefit from participation in school-based groups for children of divorce. Some children have greater difficulty in adjusting to their parents’ separation. If your child exhibits troublesome behavior over time, consider seeking help from a specialist experienced in dealing with child development and divorce.

             It may be helpful to refer to the information you received at the Parent Education Program. Many helpful age-appropriate books have been written to help you and your children through this difficult time. Your local bookstore and library are wonderful resources.

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